The Catholic Writers Guild

Step One – We admitted that we are powerless over our human desire for fame, wealth, and power – that our writing life had become unmanageable.

One night I had a dream. I dreamed that my latest novel hit the best seller list. I dreamed that movie moguls from Hollywood called. The voicemails I received indicated that they were all competing for the rights to my book – each of them offering scads of money to make the movie. What a dream. It seemed to last all night and ended with me walking up the red carpet to accept that Oscar to thunderous applause. Ah… the plight of being a writer – an unknown writer – a writer who still has to self-publish and fund most of her own work. I think most struggling artists feel this way. I believe that most of us dream this way.

After all, we pour out our souls on paper, miss family functions and nights out with friends. We spend our money on conferences instead of the latest fashion, and put our dreams on the next novel or short story. It is painful not to be noticed. It is hurtful not to make any money after our hard work. We watch other writers win prizes and gain fame. We notice when a poorly written book like Fifty Shades of Gray makes millions. We want to cry when our create space report shows few sales. This is the pain and struggle of the ordinary writer. Amp that up! Double the tension! Quadruple the stress! Let’s consider the dilemma of the Spiritual Writer.

Now we have even more pressure. After all, we are not just working for ourselves. We are working for God. He is our motive, our inspiration. How can we fail? If we fail it has to be our fault; after all it can’t be God’s fault. What a burden to carry. It’s enough to make you give up. No, a Christian never gives up. We just pray. We pray that whatever we did wrong can be corrected. We pray that we become humble enough not to care for worldly success. We work harder. Study more. Thank God for the lesson in modesty. We vow to do better the next time. We not only want to please God. We want to be flawless like God. The problem is that we are human and we have faults, needs and desires. The worst part about being a Spiritual Writer is that we can’t admit that we have those desires and needs. We can’t even admit the truth to ourselves.

However, as those who work in healing know, a person cannot be healed of an addiction, sickness or disease until they admit that they have it.  Step one of being a spiritual writer is admitting that – like any human person- we long for recognition, success and the power to influence others. We dream that all our hard work will pay off. Isn’t it hard to admit you are just human? Here, I’ll say it for you; You are not God. You are not expected to be a Saint with a capital S. You are not expected to be perfect. Yes, you are a spiritual person who has faith but you live in this world and you are influenced by all the attractive offerings of this wonderful world. You don’t have to hide your human flaws from anyone else. And you especially shouldn’t hide them from yourself. Live in truth. We all have these desires. We must admit our true feelings and deal with them or they will damage our faith, and our writing. How do we work with an honest appraisal of our inner turmoil? Let’s look at temptation and notice the way that Jesus dealt with it.

One of my favorite Bible stories is the story of Jesus being tempted by Satan in the desert. Let’s take a good look at how Jesus dealt with temptation. “And after He had fasted 40 days and 40 nights He then became hungry. And the tempter came and said to Him, ‘”If you are the Son of God, command that these stones become bread.'”  (Matthew 4:2-3)

What is the temptation here? Is it a sin to be hungry? We know it isn’t a sin to make bread. Jesus made bread to feed the multitude. He became the ‘Bread of life’ to feed his followers. He is the Eucharistic Lord. No, it’s not about bread. The temptation lies in the words “If you are the Son of God…” Satan was questioning Jesus about who he was. When you are tempted by the lure of fame, wealth and power isn’t it really about losing faith in who you truly are? Isn’t it really about the need for the world to tell you who you are? You believe that you are a Spiritual writer but you need someone else to acknowledge it before your faith is strong enough to believe it. Let’s look at how Jesus dealt with the challenge to who he was.

“But He answered and said, “It is written, ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but on every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.'” (Matthew 4:4)

What does this passage teach you about being a spiritual writer? Jesus knew who he was. He believed God the Father when he told  the crowds at his baptism that;  “This is my beloved Son”. It isn’t a matter of humility. It is a matter of faith and truth. If you truly believed that God called you to be a spiritual writer, you wouldn’t need the world to tell you who you are. You can’t even reach this level, though, if you don’t admit that you desire what the world offers. The first step calls for complete honesty. Admit that you dream of fame, wealth and power and then you can find the healing of God. More on this vital and first step to becoming who you are meant to be in the next blog.

Karen Boyce

Karen Kelly Boyce lives on a farm in N.J. with her retired husband. She is a mother and grandmother. She is the author of “The Sisters of the Last Straw” series published by Tan Books. You can see her work and learn more about her on her website: www,kkboyce.com