My husband and I are catching up on Arrow. For those that don’t know, this is a TV show about the comic book hero, the Green Arrow, and it’s really pretty good, with multiple complex story lines and good writing. I’ve yet to determine what draws every villain from the League of Assassins to mad scientists to Arrow’s home of Starling City, but they certainly get more than their fair share, and by that I mean, more than an entire crime-rid nations’ fare share.
Still, it makes for some good episodes, but I had to wonder, what if more characters in this show were faithful Catholics?
Last night we saw the episode where a drug lord, the Count, mixes up his designer drug with the flu shot to addict half the city. Apparently, everyone gets super-sick and in extreme pain unless they get a fix. The assistant DA gets the shot, falls ill in court and the Count kidnaps him in the ambulance. He takes him to a secret location and interrupts all the TV stations to broadcast the DA in pain to advertise the “cure,” available at your nearest gang-ridden street corner. (It’s comic-book TV. Go with it.)
After the adverting and posturing, he makes the ADA beg to get shot up with Vertigo on live TV. But what if the ADA had been Catholic?
Count: “Say you want it. Say it…”
ADA: “No. I’m giving it to God.”
Count: “Eh…what?”
ADA: “I united this pain with the wounds of Christ on behalf of those you’ve made suffer.”
Count: “You don’t have to suffer.” (Turns to the camera.) “Nobody has to suffer. Just go buy the Vertigo. Believe me.”
ADA: “I believe in one God, the Father Almighty…”
Your turn! Rewrite a scene from a TV show with a character as a Catholic and post it in the comments.
Karina Fabian
Karina Fabian writes everything from devotionals to serious sci-fi to comedic horror. Her latest novel, Live and Let Fly, stars a Catholic dragon and his magic-slinging partner, Sister Grace, as they save the worlds from maniacal middle managers and Norse goddesses. (Coming April from MuseItUp) Karina also teaches writing and marketing online. Learn more at http://fabianspace.com
BBC/PBS/Acorn TV offers G.K. Chesterton’s Father Brown Mysteries, updated to the 1950s, but it is the same, gentle priest–humble and more concerned with the salvation of sinners than their punishment.
I hope you all look at the four episode first season of “Ordinary,” a truly Catholic sit-com with fallible clergy, polarized laity and actual discussions of doctrine, the sacraments and programs such as the RCIA. Their second season was supposed to start on this Ash Wednesday, but their funding campaign ran far short of their needs. They haven’t given up.
You can find them on-line. It takes about 100 minutes to view all four episodes. Check them out. They are a lot closer to production and to reality than anything else I know.
Remember that Saint James urges to show our faith through works. Helping “Ordinary” would certainly promote the Catholic presence in the media.
Instead of a an ADA he slips Sister Saint Joseph the drug who begins to suffer.
SSJ :Sweet Mother Mary come to my assistance.
Count: Is there something wrong Sister?
SSJ: My body is afflicted as if I am being attacked by demons.
Count: Worse than demons sister, your suffering from withdraw.
SSJ: What do you mean?
Count: Your flu shot, I laced it with a drug and now you’re hooked.
Sister takes in a deep breath and stands absolutely erect. Here brow furrows and her eyes pierce out from under her coronet.
SSJ: You laced the vaccines.
Count: Yes and now you all have to do my bidding.
SSJ: Francis Aloysius Count Trafanti you have crossed the line young man.
Count: Uh – what
SSJ: You have crossed the line. Pray for your soul young man because your butt is mine or rather it will be HERS!
Count; Uh- Wait a minute sister, NOT HER
The count starts to shake in fear , sweat pours from every pour his clothing becomes drenched.
Count: For the Love of God sister stop, not HER!
Ignoring his pleas Sister Saint Joseph grabs the count and spins him around. He continues to beg for mercy but she ignores him and write in perfect cursive a note on a piece paper. Finished, she spins him around again.
SSJ: “Open young man.”
Reluctantly the Count opens his mouth. SSJ folds the paper and placed it between his lips.
SSJ: Now go! And it will be worse for every saliva stain on this note. Pray for your immortal soul Aloysius for as surely as my body is racked with pain you will feel worse.
Off he went, barely able to walk on his quaking legs, off to see Reverend Mother!
It reminds me of how modern sitcoms all but ignore the “Religious” discussions for uncomfortable silences whereas in the “controversial” sitcoms of the ’70s (of which I have only seen recently because of my age) had no problem with people speaking of Catholicism or how it was different from general Protestant beliefs and was intertwined with their plots. It certainly made sitcoms from that era more interesting to watch.
For a society that prides itself on being “free” it sure is strange that they talk about less in public than they did only a few decades ago.
“For a society that prides itself on being “free” it sure is strange that they talk about less in public than they did only a few decades ago.”
We are categorically forbidden now to judge anything, and one casualty is our education system, because our kids are consequently shut down on any inquiry that involves interpretation of data. In literature, they can answer factual questions but are not able to generate a thesis regarding what the details add up to in terms of the message or meaning of the writing and are unable to take on side, say which of two conflicting theses they support. I don’t know what this means in science or engineering or math, but I imagine it adds up to the same thing. Any idea that seems to challenge another is muted. The ‘good’ (expensive, essay-based) tests insist that students form a thesis to get the best scores, so schools (schools that succeed) must teach kids to do this, and do try, it is a standard on most good rubrics, but it’s like pulling teeth, both kids and teachers get very uncomfortable (dangerous territory! teachers are not allowed to promote discussions in which politically incorrect ideas are even voiced, and they are punished for it if they do at evaluation and schedule-setting time). Kids have learned to obey this unwritten rule and it is making them stupid.
This is a marvelous prompt! I believe one might find it difficult to carry out, though. Flannery O’Connor complained that religion was so absent from America’s public life that writing authentic religious characters was next to impossible (although, alas, that did not stop her from supporting secularism). But she did have religious characters, drawn from two sources, Catholic (like Ruby Turpin in Revelation) and protestant, most of the rest. I believe she said, or perhaps I only concluded, that she could draw more easily on the protestant source because they simply have the greater number of ‘religious nuts,’ I’m sorry, I mean people who make their religion public through their actions, not nice and tidily ‘private’ as secularism demands of us, so that one can base believable characters on that. That is why–I’m getting to a point–it is possible, just possible, that in order to complete the prompt, that is, writing Catholic characters, we have to have way more people living really authentic Catholic lives. Speaking up–I mean, not where it’s safe among one’s own friends, or anonymously on the web, but at work, at the market, in the family. Being disagreeable. Being considered rude or ignorant (although others may be nicer at it or at least braver than I, I think the challenge of speaking up makes me shrill). Even better, if we had one Catholic candidate running on a truly Catholic platform, that would give a writer a lot of room, not to mention save the country.
Let’s do all the real-life things so we can write authentic Catholic characters! Otherwise, suspect we would already be making a living doing so, Hollywood would already be casting them. They make for ever so much better drama.
I love your vision.